Refuge Nights

Since I've been home I've been crashing in my mothers house in this small room. Where during the day I spend a lot of time. Tonight out of all night I came across this perfume I bought from Charlotte Russe 
Soon as the scent hit my nose... flashbacks of tears and cold dark nights I walked by myself 
He will never know the damage that he caused because he needed the to have a name. 
The scent of him still lingers around my head and in my mind because he left such a scar. 
Never in my life have I ever been treated in such a way.....
It only lasted a couple of months then it faded it away... the interest was lost but the scar still remained. 
The Night I walked back to my place of residence alone tears streaming from my face....
Only person name I could think of was a person I took for regretted and left. 
He protected me and would never allow harm to come my way. 
He loved me for me and never lied or cheated 
But I was selfish and wanted more than he was already giving 
Sometimes I wish that I never looked at you 
Held conversation or even said Hello w/ a smile
Wish I never exchanged numbers 
Wish I Never agreed to that 1st walk
Because these bad memories follow the scent from 




Refuge Nights 

Memeories

Today is Mother's Day && yesterday I took my mom to get her toes done 
While I was receiving a pedicure as well I realize how much this lady really loves me 
Since I was a little girl she would always try her hardest to give me what I wanted
I was an only child for about five years before [[Annie]] came along "I Love my little Sister" 
As a little girl I remember the walks to the pizza place or the Chinese Store....back then in Philadelphia transportation wasn't a B I G deal. 
The walks from the grocery store and how I always had to carry the bread and didn't want to.... lol 
So I would tell my mom how heavy the bag was so I wouldn't have to carry the ONE LOAF of bread 
=) Those were the days, The times I would beg my mom for a dollar to get Ice Cream from the Ice cream truck then complain when I didn't eat the Ice Cream quick enough and started to melt down my arm...lol =) Those times were the stories my mother tells my friends of how prissy I was.....  I was sooo young and never realize how much my mother was working hard for me, to provide the things she did provide for me.
It was always just me and her....

Un-Thinkable

Afraid to Love and to Live 

Always self-conscience of action

Rude and Funny 

Loving and Understanding but needy 

The looks that live in the eyes are the ones no one ever sees 

Living is more than what it seems, the need of belong is more of the job 

Kisses and hugs are like commitments and SEX is a marriage

Damage so many times and lied to is a death sentence in the book of Romance 

Craving the day when everything said would be believable 

Lies would not be told and the truth would be somewhere near the surface of the heart 

Faithful should not be the cause of Trustworthy 

These words should be the bond that holds the pieces together

I always Love fast and live slow!

Maybe I will see the day that I will be LOVED back 

I have everything I need

Just maybe the things I want would be the things I do not need 

I love Easy and Live life soooooo Slow! 

Ah ha ha Maybe one day I'll realize that I don't need Love! 

Love is now Dead in my book until I am LOVED 1st.......